Today I had a seemingly simple and insignificant day but for me it was something to lose sleep over and kept my stress levels on high all day.
Today I had an appointment at the Royal Orthopedic Hospital in Birmingham. The appointment was to sort out a pain I've been having in my back for a few years now, so it was an appointment with intended positive results. Unfortunately, however, I find it difficult to think about these positive outcomes and spent the upcoming days worrying about the fact I was working the morning, leaving to go to my appointment that is about a 45 minute drive away, and then coming back for work in the afternoon. For me, having more than one thing planned in a day, unless they are distantly spaced apart, is a very daunting and stressful situation. I feel the need to plan the day down to minutes and seconds to ensure I don't miss anything, or let anyone down, whatever. I struggled to even sleep last night thinking about the exact timings of my day over and over again.
The reason I was having the appointment was for my back pain which, as I said, has been troubling me for a few years. I found out that the main reason it was troubling me was due to the fact I stressed too much and was unable to relax or relieve the tension building up. Stress and anxiety are huge problems in my life due to various reasons and the stress that today caused me shows just how easily little things can effect me. The silly/annoying thing is that it is all a vicious cycle because if I am stressed my back hurts more, if my back hurts it prevents me from doing things, including sleeping, and if I can't do things/sleep I become more stressed and around it goes with more pain and more stress.
The appointment was reasonably helpful and plans were made and I was given a book to start reading through. I have already started reading it and it seems interesting and I'm finding it very easy to relate to.
I'm hoping with the intended plans that will take place throughout this treatment that I will not only be able to sort my back issue out but I will also be able to be less stressed. All of which will have so many knock on effects.
My main motivation (other than feeling better both physically and mentally) is to be able to get back to doing my art which I am very passionate about (as shown through my blogging).
It turns out that today ran pretty smoothly anyway and there wasn't too much to worry about...
Bye for now!
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