Self Portrait Painting - Time Lapse

I haven't done much painting in ages so I really wanted to do something and I've made it into a short video to watch on YouTube! Take a look...

Bye for now! xxx

The disgusting world of self-promotion

My last blog post was pretty much a complete self promotion post. It was a little disgusting. Made me feel sick to the core that anyone needs to do such a thing. Having said that, I'm going to do almost the same thing in this post but be a little more interesting about it.

So now that I have been blunt and told you the raw truth about what this blog post is going to be about, lets get straight into it!

At the end of the day, if you can't self promote then you won't get anywhere. Unless you spam, in which case you don't deserve to get anywhere.

Well, I'm just going to quickly put it out there that it would be great if you could like my Facebook page HERE and subscribe to my YouTube channel HERE.


There! Done. That wasn't too bad. Like quickly ripping off a plaster (band aid).

So basically, I'm hoping exciting stuff will happen where I can start creating masterpieces and prints of those masterpieces and sell them to all of the world. The best place to keep up with this is on Facebook and I would just love all the support I can get.

Okay thanks for reading this.

Bye for now! xxx

Getting things back in order...

I just thought I would type up a very, very, very quick blog post saying how I will be starting up using YouTube again and start an art Facebook page.

THIS is my YouTube page

YouTube
YouTube
YouTube



Links to all things will be in a post soon when it is all set up and ready! For now, check out my old YouTube videos and watch this space...

Sorry for the short post but things are hoping to be busier soon!


Bye for now! xx

Unfullfilled days

The past few days, which are turning into weeks, have been lazy. Unsatisfying-ly lazy.

'I don't know...' is becoming a standard start to every sentence I think, speak, act upon. I don't know who I am, where I am, what I'm doing. I'm just not with it at all. I'm waiting for the moment I snap back into reality but I don't know when that will be.

Confused.

So I'm trying to take each day at a time but my brain likes to wander and think ahead.

I'm unsatisfied with how my life is going at the moment. I want to be doing more with it, but I just don't know how. I want to do silly things like have the opportunity to dress up in nice, new (well, new to me), quirky outfits, and create excessive amounts of art that I don't even have enough wall space for them to occupy, and relax reading all the books I've wanted to read and books I don't even know I want to read yet.

Easier said than done...

Bye for now!! x

The problems of being an artist - #2

I have a feeling this series is going to make me appear like a very negative artist. I'm not; there are just a few minor issues that come with the job.

Appalling nails being one of them.
 

 

Okay so they don't look so bad here but that's only because I'm making a huge effort to make them look half decent. You can see here that they are quite short, that's because they are constantly breaking to a point where I just have to cut them all to a short length and attempt the growing process again. They will also usually have paint under or around the edge of the nails which is literally impossible to remove. It may sound simple but I can scrub for hours with no success and it just ends up looking like I haven't cleaned my nails in months. Or my hands for that matter because they'll have some kind of ink/paint stains on them too.

It's kind of annoying that I can't show you their usual terrible state because of the fact I'm trying to make them look good.

So my nails are constantly splitting and I don't know how to fix that (help me?). I'm trying to stop the constant breaking nails by filing them to an even length and ensure I always file the parts that break rather than biting them off. Yes, I bite the broken bits off and yes that's a horrible thing to do. I don't bite them generally, only when they break. But I'm determined to get out of that habit, keep them filed and put a clean clear coat of nail polish on top to attempt to harden them. Wish me luck!

Bye for now! xxx

The motivation is here! Where's the ability?

Things are not going well. I have all the motivation at the moment to create some art, all the ideas whizzing around my head at 100mph ready to just be put onto paper/canvas/whatever, but it's just not happening.

Why is it that I have the most fantastic idea in my head but I just can't produce that idea in 'real life'? It's as if the message sent from my brain to my hands just isn't all there and I produce something unexpected, and not something good.

The above is an example of something that isn't wrong but also isn't right. Everything I'm producing isn't wrong but also isn't right. It's good enough to sit in the back of a cupboard but not good enough to show anyone.

Am I feeling to much pressure?

Whatever it is, I'm really doubting my abilities and it's not a great feeling.

I think my brain just thinks I'm amazing but the truth is a little more of an average result.

Anyone else ever feel this way?

I need some help!

Bye for now! x

The problems of being an artist - #1

Yes, this may actually end up becoming a series as I can already think of a few and that's just what is at the top of my head, without any deep thought...

Problem number 1, mess. See image below.

I would apologise for the mess but, if you notice what is actually out of place in the image and is causing a mess, you will notice it is mainly art equipment. As an artist, and I am unsure whether other artists will agree with me on this one, I have two contradicting minds. One wants to have a lovely tidy place to live with no mess. The other would like to express itself and produce art and, whilst in the middle of the production of said art, would like to leave it everywhere so it is easy to come back and pick up where I left off at any moment. This is why all artists should have a studio. It's just a lot easier said than done.

I just wonder how many other artists agree with this?

You'll hear of more problems to come, I am sure...

Bye for now! x

One feeling explained

'My current life feeling' was going to be the title but now I realise that is too vague as I could actually write a book on that.

I was thinking about where 'home' is. (Where the heart is, I know.)

I don't believe I have had a home for a few years. I currently live in a flat and, to me, that is not a home as it is rented and it has an end period of time when I have to leave, making me unable to settle and rest.

I see myself and my belongings as hovering above the ground. This is just my mental image and feeling so it is a hard one to translate into words to make anyone else understand, but if you follow what I'm saying then, well done. I picture an image of myself and everything that I personally own floating just off the ground, perhaps a foot high. All of my 'things' are scattered around at the flat, my mum's and my dad's. If they were together in one place where I am too, and somewhere preferably permanent so there is no feeling of being unable to relax, then that would be home.

The floating feeling is so that I can hover and wait before the next movement. If I allow myself to relax I won't want to move, even if I know I have to.

Soon I would like to feel safe and in a home.

I hope this doesn't make too little sense. I am hoping to create a piece of artwork on it soon which may demonstrate the feelings in a clearer way.

Bye for now!
xx

This day of this month of this year

Today I had a seemingly simple and insignificant day but for me it was something to lose sleep over and kept my stress levels on high all day.

Today I had an appointment at the Royal Orthopedic Hospital in Birmingham. The appointment was to sort out a pain I've been having in my back for a few years now, so it was an appointment with intended positive results. Unfortunately, however, I find it difficult to think about these positive outcomes and spent the upcoming days worrying about the fact I was working the morning, leaving to go to my appointment that is about a 45 minute drive away, and then coming back for work in the afternoon. For me, having more than one thing planned in a day, unless they are distantly spaced apart, is a very daunting and stressful situation. I feel the need to plan the day down to minutes and seconds to ensure I don't miss anything, or let anyone down, whatever. I struggled to even sleep last night thinking about the exact timings of my day over and over again.

The reason I was having the appointment was for my back pain which, as I said, has been troubling me for a few years. I found out that the main reason it was troubling me was due to the fact I stressed too much and was unable to relax or relieve the tension building up. Stress and anxiety are huge problems in my life due to various reasons and the stress that today caused me shows just how easily little things can effect me. The silly/annoying thing is that it is all a vicious cycle because if I am stressed my back hurts more, if my back hurts it prevents me from doing things, including sleeping, and if I can't do things/sleep I become more stressed and around it goes with more pain and more stress.

The appointment was reasonably helpful and plans were made and I was given a book to start reading through. I have already started reading it and it seems interesting and I'm finding it very easy to relate to.

I'm hoping with the intended plans that will take place throughout this treatment that I will not only be able to sort my back issue out but I will also be able to be less stressed. All of which will have so many knock on effects.

My main motivation (other than feeling better both physically and mentally) is to be able to get back to doing my art which I am very passionate about (as shown through my blogging).

It turns out that today ran pretty smoothly anyway and there wasn't too much to worry about...

Bye for now!

Obsessive Compulsive Cleaning

'Obsessive Compulsive Cleaning' is a British programme that I am truly in love with. I think I can relate to it on a certain level (definitely not as extreme as some of the people on the programme!), I also find it interesting but hard to understand how the hoarders/non-cleaners can live how they do.

I was so interested in this subject matter I did one of my a-level projects on it (a lot of talk of my a-levels lately, sorry!).

Here are some photos from the project:

I'd love to hear your comments.

Bye for now!

A-Level Art

For my A-Level exam art work I did a project on transvestites and transgenders. The theme was 'Inside, Outside and In Between'. I interpreted this as how you feel on the inside, look on the outside and every aspect in between. Obviously I could've have gone down any route but this subject matter captured my attention and made me want to explore 'why?', in an positively open-minded approach.

I used a model for the basis of my work; to take photos from, and to sketch and draw. He wanted to have copies of the work when finished so a couple of weeks ago (when I finally got my work back after a year) I let him borrow the work.

I thought I'd take advantage of the fact that he got some great quality copies of the work and asked for some digital copies. I thought I'd post them here to be seen:

I hope you like some of it and please feel free to leave me with any of your comments!

Bye for now!

Baby Drawing

Despite the fact I haven't actually done any art properly in a long time, I did finish this drawing the other day. Although, I started the drawing over a month ago and probably did most of it within 45mins but then left it to finish the finishing touches another day and that wasn't until earlier this week. That's typical from me. I'm too scared to say that I'm finished. Perhaps it's because someone else's judgement may be that it isn't finished so I don't want to commit to thinking it without another's approval.

Anyway, it is now finished.

This was actually as an unpaid commission for a friend. They had their first child just over 2 years ago now and they gave us some photos of him after he was born. I decided to spontaneously draw the one picture of the baby yawning and gave it them as a gift.

Here is the instagram photo of that drawing.

So this year they had a new baby and thought they'd keep the theme going by giving me a photo of him yawning for me to draw. The result is the drawing at the start of the blog. I'm quite happy with it.

What I find interesting is the similarities and differences between the two drawing styles after 2 years. It's mainly the learnt technique that has changed rather than the style of the art.

I hope you like both drawings and feel free to comment with any opinions.

Bye for now!

Anxiety Undiscussed

I have just read this blog post and it has really got me thinking.

It made me think that I'm sure I already channel my anxiety into something, but it's not necessarily what I would like to be channeling it into.

I believe I channel it into where I work. I spend much time as I can there and I'm sure it's the money that is motivating me to do so, however, I also find it a place where I don't have to think I just do. I work each day and sleep at night and there is no time to think about other things. This isn't really helping me though. It stresses me more as working that hard makes me very tired which makes me more stressed. The worst part about the situation is not having a rest from it all, so I will have days at work where I just can't do anything, no will power allows me to do anything.

I wish I could channel the energy from my anxiety into my art. At the moment I have so little energy after I have finished work that I can't do any work at all. Let alone work with energy in it that I enjoy creating. It really has been a while since I created work that I truly enjoyed doing and have had a reason for creating.

This is only a small blog post. Maybe one day I will go more into my anxiety in a post. I find it a relieving thing to do and I don't know whether people read the posts or not but perhaps they do and find them interesting to relate to.

Bye for now!

It's been a while... Oops

It's been a while *blushes due to lack of motivation to write blog posts*.

Oh well! A lot has been going on with my job and I've moved into a flat and ramble, ramble, ramble - we'll save that for another time.

Today I thought I'd pop into Waterstones to spend the rest of my book voucher and I found a book that even the cover was inspiring me so I had to buy it.

The Art of Urban Sketching

I love sketchbooks. I love the lack of precision with them. That images seem hurried and caught in the moment but this just adds to the story the drawing is telling. I have done a lot of on-the-go sketchbook drawings when on art holidays that I went on with school, but I have never found it a comfortable thing. I love seeing what other people produce but have never been overly satisfied with the results I was getting from my own sketchbook. Although, I look back on my sketchbooks now and find them really interesting to flick through.

The amount of detail that someone can actually get into a drawing in a public, and sometimes uncomfortable, space is just amazing. It's just about having the confidence to sit/stand somewhere for, what could be, a long time.

There are so many different styles and techniques that I see when looking through the book that I'm itching to get started on some sketches. I want to experiment with different techniques and hopefully develop some confidence with working in public.

This last image shows drawings/paintings done on public transport, something accessed by so many people on a day-to-day basis but no one thinks to look at the people around them in such a way and in so much detail. The two styles just shown here are so different and I especially love the bottom sketch which appears to have such free-flowing, quick marks that still clearly depict the people sitting in the typically uncomfortable, upright position of a passenger on public transport.

Hopefully this blog post with be followed up with images of my own work in a sketchbook I start to take everywhere. (Although that could be a while! I need serious encouragement and motivation.)

Bye for now!

Inspiring Art/Journals

Yesterday I was just flicking(/clicking) through Bloglovin posts and came across a blog that I started to go through all the posts of. I found it seriously inspiring and it just made me want to grab a sketchbook and get drawing/painting/sketching!

http://www.jennys-sketchbook.com/ << this is the blog!

This is one of her videos but have a look through them all! I love them.

Bye for now!

Marilyn Monroe Drawing

This drawing is something I'm selling on Etsy so I thought I would show here some of the stages that built up to this finished drawing.

This process can be seen in more detail on YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QE1vEOcMMos&feature=c4-overview&list=UUfp5V4Oj3SKjJHTPnfC2pcw

If you like this then you can buy it at Shed Creativity: https://www.etsy.com/uk/listing/174601733/marilyn-monroe-graphite-drawing-detailed?

Bye for now!

Etsy Shops

Cheeky blog post here just telling you about my shop in-case you're interested!

I actually have two shops selling different items; one sells handmade crafts (that I've made) and my artwork, whilst the other sells vintage clothing.

Etsy shop - Shed Creativity

Hanging Decoration - Red and White Round Felt Snowflake

Marilyn Monroe Graphite Drawing

Etsy shop - Where to Buy Vintage

Black and White Check Patterned Skirt

Lambskin Coat (now sold but more coming soon)

Please check out both of my shops! I add new things all the time and more items will be added soon, this is just a taster of my shops.

Happy shopping!

Bye for now!